if it wasn't for the cake...

i'm always looking out for great birthday party ideas. but, unfortunately, i don't think this one will make the cut.

we all were pretty stoked about ice skating. everything was free, and hot cocoa and birthday cake would be provided, why not?

the romantic and blissfully fun idea of ice skating as a family or a mass horde of school children is a horrific contrast to the reality of it.

first off, the overwhelming smell of dirty, sweaty hockey feet was almost too much to bear. never book a party at an ice skating rink before, during, or after hockey games. sweaty hockey guys = gross.

secondly, if you are going to throw a party at an ice skating rink for a bunch of 4-7 year olds - well, i'd just stop you right there and say don't do it - unless of course, you're ready to deal with a slew of falling, crying children. i'm surprised we didn't have to sign some kind of waiver seeing as how dangerous it all was. lucky for us, sam was out on the ice with both isaiah and makayah who only received a few bumps and bruises - no tears. sigh of relief.

these ice skating walkers should've been given out to all the kids - i'm sure there would've been less tears and owies.

...and despite protests, make them wear their gloves.

third: although your child may be irresistibly adorable in her cute tinkerbell toque and fluffy coat, it's really not a good idea to let her have a taste of ice skating if you're not going to allow her to run loose the entire time. that just ends up in screams of jealousy. watching kids ice skate behind the glass wall is not as fun as actually being out there with the laughing, falling, crying kids. who knew?

but if you do give into the temptation for your squawking and very eager child to take a run with daddy, then go for it, but pass up the tedious skates. snow boots are just fine for slipping around.

fourth: know that at some point you will want to call it quits and head back to the party room just to escape the madness and barricade the eager baby. it's quite important for you to bring lots of extra food to keep the baby barricaded, otherwise you run into the problem of chasing said baby down the disgustingly smelly feet hallways - and that will make you want to puke if you can't hold your breath for very long.

 fifth: don't bring your good camera. you think you'll be snapping these amazing shots of an amazing night out on the ice, but really you won't. your hands will be busy holding the squirming baby if you have one (if you're at all concerned with her running back onto the ice and being trampled by the inexperienced and very clumsy skaters) - or if you are the host or parent of a kid without the skating walker, well, you're out of luck, too. most likely, you'll be too busy keeping kids from falling or calming kids from crying. that escape to the empty birthday room is looking quite inviting, isn't it?

 sixth: provide lots and lots of hot cocoa and birthday cake. i swear, if it wasn't for the lure of birthday cake and hot cocoa i would've packed up my cute bundle of a baby and abandoned my crowfoot crew in leu of grocery shopping. but, being with child at 30 weeks - it was simply unthinkable to pass up birthday cake.

hot cocoa made up for the lack of skating for this little sweetie pie. 

don't forget the marshmallows.

point number seven: don't forget the eating utensils. but if you do, it won't deter the big pregnant woman from scarfing down her piece of cake anyhow. kids, meh - when it comes to cake - who needs utensils?

and lastly, about those screaming kids...

let them run around in circles after they've had their sugar rush. no need to bring that back home with you. it also helps to have someone like sam with a big, loud, papa bear voice to get them all to sit down and be quiet before singing happy birthday or opening presents. unless you have that big papa bear voice, it'll be foolish of you and inevitably pointless to try to maintain the kind of noise and chaos 15 kids on a sugar high can create.

verdict? i had much more "fun" showering all my kids after the party and putting them to bed. ahhh, time to relax.